Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Dear Karen, I am not married because...

Dear Karen, I am not married because...

The answer to the question, posed by Karen Alchorn to me on the day of Erica Crystal Patterson's funeral, still rings in my head years later.

I remember being surrounded by a large group of women i barely knew or hadn't seen for years and having had a week of sadness whilst working on the video of her photographs for the service.
I was hit with the question at my most vulnerable state of being. What a bitch.
I want to believe her intentions innocent, but I can't help but wonder...

But it really is a legitimate question if without malice ~
so the inventory of my mind and choices is examined.

I can honestly say, that I have been with some exquisite men, but none that I could have married.
I require a level of honest communication and mood accountability that is very hard to find. But without these things i believe a marriage would fail .

So, I act out not, on desperation,
but on faith in myself on my own.

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